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| care for the welfare of the person (ultimate love) |
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| a friend is someone who you like and choose to relate to in a special way. It is a mutual relationship |
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| What are the 3 common elements of friendship? |
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common interests
similar attitudes |
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| Some friendships are based solely on ___ even though our outlook on life may be different. Others are based on ____. |
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| deliberately acting a way different from what one thinks or feels in order to give others a false impression |
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| *people who are sure of themselves and of their worth generally dont need to brag or build themselves up* |
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| prejudices and stereotypes |
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automatically drawing unfounded conclusions because a person is different or part of a particular group
Ex- man with a high voice is gay |
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| not necessarily bad unless we isolate ourselves not to be open to new people |
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-mutual respect for spiritual dignity of the person
-genuine concern for eachother
-involves committment (loyalty and faithfulness)
-it frees each person to be loving and involved with others
-a relationship where the people are interdependent |
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| Ingredients of a Friendship: (5) |
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1. period of getting to know one another
2. period of testing and trial
3. mutual choice (to continue to love, etc.)
4. constant time of renewing and regenerating |
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| What are the 4 stages of growth in a friendship? |
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| choleric, sanguine, melancholic, & phlegmatic |
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| What are the 4 personality types (temperaments)? |
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aggressive and willing to take a firm stand or to take the initiative in leadership- this temperment is sometimes aggressive and hot-tempered and can be hostile
+... determination, self-discipline, organizer
-... bad temper, pride, bully |
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geared for work with people, frienly, warm and sensitive to the needs of others, appreciates beauty and has vitality- ability to bounce back with a joke and a smile
+... confident, light-hearted, geared for work with people
-... can be too trivial, surface-type person; too easy-going; too easily hurt my rejection, too concerned for externals |
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refkective and introspective- listener. can be moody, brooding. often the artist. likes alone time.
+... avility to concentrate, to feel deeply, to stay at someting a long time
-... moodiness and depression, excessice shyness, can hold grudges for a long time |
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remains calm and unflustered in excitement (whether in happiness or in difficulty). tends to be sluggish, apathetic. Needs prodding to get going.
+... loyalty, ability to stay at boring tasks, gentleness, and warmth
-... laziness, could become like a vegetable |
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1. ability to cope well with reality
2. respect for the rights of others
3. correct idea of love
4. accomplishments as opposed to procrastination
5. ability to live by goals and values
6. living in the present an not in the past or future |
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| What are characteristics of maturity? (8) |
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| people who are aware of their emotions, but don't let their emotions control them. thy make decisions on reason as well as emotion. |
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| choose things that will bring them cloer to God and not things which take us away from Him. |
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| loneliness (being lonely) |
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| negative experience, a sense of isolation or alienation from others, whether we're with others or not; it is a universal human experience; _ can kill (suicide) |
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| positive experience- having no one around you- doesnt mean alienation- can be _ yet feel connected to others. we all need time by ourselves to relax and get in touch with our inner selves |
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| You cant love others unless you care about yourself. That’s why Jesus used true love of self as the guideline for how we’re to love others. |
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| Loving yourself is essential.. why? |
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| A main reason for relationship problems is that one or both partners don’t __________. |
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| Lack of self esteem blocks _______ - especially in close, long term relationships |
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| People think loving oneself is being _____ and _____ |
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| Selfishness and conceit can be misguided attempts to compensate for a lack of _______. |
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| Physical, psychological, social, spiritual welfare. |
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| Loving yourself means caring responsibly about your _______, _____, ______, and _________. |
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| Physical, psychological, social, spiritual welfare. |
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| Loving yourself means caring responsibly about your _______, _____, ______, and _________. |
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| Love is a circle in which loving others is _________ |
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| Love is a circle in which loving others is _________ |
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| Most often the circle of love is first broken by neglect or abuse in _________ |
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-Believe in yourself and your unique value as a person
-Accept and respect yourself
-Care about you total welfare but don’t worry about it constantly |
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| How to love yourself in a healthy way... |
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-If you know how valuable you are, you can realize and respect how valuable everyone is. Maybe you’re not rich, famous, good looking, or extraordinarily gifted. But you have one thing no one else has:
-Your uniqueness. No one else can think, say, or |
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| Believe in yourself and your unique value as a person... |
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| To feel good about yourself, realize how God love you unconditionally despite your __________ |
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| adult faith, loving and helping, integrity |
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| _______ means being convinced that God loves us and desires our happiness and fulfillment. Grow as a person by ______ and _____ others. Seek positive experiences and good relationships. And be honest with yourself and others, for self respect demands ________. |
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| -Health, appearance, fitness, or how long you’re going to live -Proper perspective |
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| Don’t obsess over your ______ ,______ , ______, or __________. Being trim beautiful isn’t your goal in life and none of us will live here forever! Keep things in ________ and focus each day on what really matters. You won’t be deeply happy if you live superficially. Care for you health responsibly but also live your life – don’t just try to extend it. |
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| Seek mainly to accomplish your ______ and leave the rest in God’s hands. God always cares far more about you than you do. |
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| self-confidence, low self-esteem |
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| When we lack self esteem about who we are, we don’t have ________ in what we do. Many people seem plagued with _________. That’s why many successful employment agencies focus on enhancing their clients’ self-esteem. |
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| Belief in oneself; self respect |
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| Belief in one’s abilities; self assurance |
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| Belief on ourselves gives us ______ and ______. When their self-esteem is _____ people don’t have the confidence to apply for the jobs they want – or to ask for the raises they deserve. |
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| yourself, self-confident; attitude |
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Psychologists tell us this works:
Make a habit of thinking positively about _______ and of acting as if you are _________. Changing your behavior will help you change your ________. |
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| We’ve all experienced the truth of the great literary work of Don Quixote: _____ transforms what seems ugly in us and makes us feel beautiful. In his madness Don Quixote believe the prostitute Aldonza was a lady of virtue. So he treated her with respect although she ridiculed him for it. Don Quixote constant belief in her Dulcinea finally led her to believe in her own dignity and goodness. She them began to act like the lady Don Quixote believed she was. |
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| When our attitude is _____ our behavior generally _______. Constant loving reinforcement enabled Aldonza to change her attitude about herself and thus to become her best self – Dulcinea. Here are some practical ways to build your self esteem. |
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| qualities, possibilities, shortcomings |
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| Focus on your positive ______ and ______ rather than on you ________. |
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| confidently, capable person |
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| Visualize yourself acting _______ and keep telling yourself that you are a ________. |
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| reach out; kind; do love you |
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| _______ ____. Make special efforts to be ____ toward others and to recall how much God and others ______ ___. |
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| At the opposite self-esteem extreme are ______ individuals who think way too highly of themselves. |
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| inflated, distorted; superior; discipline |
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| Narcissist have an _______, _____ sense of themselves. They believe their _______ to others and as at though the world revolves around them. Sometimes narcissism results from lack of proper ___________ - perhaps being praised no matter what one does, perhaps hardly ever being corrected. |
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| unhealthy, selfish, self-centered |
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| Narcissism represents an _____, ________, __________ type of self love |
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| Narcissists grow up believing that the world should _____ them. They demand others’ “_______” without earning it, but their greatly inflated self-opinion becomes their _______. |
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| They can’t handle it when others respond negatively to their conceited air of _______. Because they’ve been undeservedly praised so often, they refuse to accept legitimate _________. |
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| Having a healthy self-esteem means being realistic about ____________ and accepting you ____________. |
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| It involves having the _______ to admit mistakes and accept just _________. |
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| The interesting gift of being limited and imperfect is that we can know we’re loved for __________ and not for our ____________. Perhaps that type of acceptance is the main thing the superior-seeming narcissist lacks. |
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